Blue is the colour of my dreams, the inside and the outside worlds tilting but never quite fully falling over. The flutter of the leaves in the wind and the beauty of the sky’s colours urged me to look up, to embrace the vast emptiness of existence. No comfort was found, history meaning nothing to the future, but no comfort was needed. It wasn’t that life is on a constant knife-edge of imbalance, when is it not?, but the fact that I could embrace the now, the cold comfort of the wind and the cawing of the birds as my own. Distinctly my own, this moment and nothing more. That nothing, or rather no moment, truly mattered or matters in the great cosmic life course of universal matter. We were born and we will die, from whence we began we will return.
…”You know my feelings on our family, I’m sick of being treated as a small child – I am adult!
“You need to relax, you know you are in a very lucky position being able to live at home still, sure dad may stick his oar in where it sometimes doesn’t require, but just put up with it for the minute”.
…..”How beautiful is this lanscape, this beach and the rolloing waves?”
“It’s cold, I’m cold! Can we go home now?”
“Just a bit further, a bit longer….”
…”I’ve hit the bottom, I know I have. I’m sick of this job, sick of not doing anything each weekend, I need to escape, I need something to hang on to”.
“The job is fine, everyone is in the same position you know, you should count yourself lucky that you can do what you do. Have you though about writing any more or trying to meet new people?”
“Well I have tried, a bit, but it’s tough and then….”
…”Your grandfather used to work on the ships you know, in the merchant navy. Went around the world, spending weeks and months at sea, only to have a few days of shore leave at the end of it. A different story today of course, where shore leave is ever more compacted, don’t have the fun that you used have!”
“Dad, shut up! Tell me more about grandad and his adventures on the high seas…”
The old thought was on my mind as I took this picture. What are you doing, where are you going?